16 responses

  1. retirebyforty
    April 23, 2011

    Hey, you have to do what you have to do to get though the dark time. You are in a better place now and that’s what counts.
    I think friends and family is helpful when you’re in that situation. One of our friend is having postpartum depression and although I don’t have that experience I try to cheer her up. It’s much more difficult to go through dark times by yourself.

    • Money Reasons
      April 23, 2011

      This was a time way back when I just started college, I’m way past that point now.

      I think caring friends can help, but in the end the person in that state needs to find a way out themselves. Kind friends definitely doesn’t hurt though!

      I still a big fan today of NIN and other alternative bands even today. I’m a fan of all good music, no matter the type.

  2. First Gen American
    April 23, 2011

    I listened to that NIN album constantly. Great album, although I didn’t find it depressing. Should I have?

    I think tough times are magnified by 100 when you are still a hormonal teenager. People mellow with age. Breakups were so much harder in my teens than as a young adult.

    My tips:
    I think having someone safe to talk to is really key. This is a person that won’t judge you and will be okay with you talking irrationally.

    Also, keep telling yourself that things will get better eventually.

    Oh, and get out of your head if it’s taking you into dark places. Call someone.

    • Money Reasons
      April 23, 2011

      No, NIN isn’t depressing, Trent is great!!!

      I agree, when you are young and inexperienced with other people’s problems you are kind of feed to the wolves. Earlier girlfriends were no problems. But, this particular ex-girlfriend’s experiences and problems were to rough for me at the time. The break was clean and good for both of us. After her, I didn’t try to save the world as much…

      Now that I’m older, I’m definitely a different person than back then…

  3. Moneycone
    April 23, 2011

    You are so right – some people just don’t mix! I’ve seen a few of my friends and anyone (except them) could tell they wouldn’t last long!

    Friends definitely help. I’m glad you decided to break it off and start fresh!

    • Money Reasons
      April 23, 2011

      It was great at first, but then slowly her problems came out and even though was a nice person, I couldn’t help her. My background was nothing like hers. We had absolutely nothing in common.

  4. Kay Lynn @ Bucksome Boomer
    April 23, 2011

    A comforting song to me at times is “Everybody Hurts” by REM.

    Thanks for sharing. I feel like I got to know you a little better today.

    • Money Reasons
      April 23, 2011

      I almost included that, but I wasn’t as bad as that, and that was a later song (have you heard the Johnny Cash version, very sad). I think that particular song was too drug oriented for my anyway. Great song all the same, we make such song relate to using in our own experiences!

      Trent is one of my favorite songwriters and performers. I wish I saw him in concert when I was younger, but the crowd I hung with just wasn’t into him.

  5. Financial Samurai
    April 23, 2011

    Cheer up Don! Step away from the cliff!

    I like NIN. We all go through dark times, but then I think about the children in Ethiopia or India starving, and I’m like… get it together Sam!

    • Money Reasons
      April 23, 2011

      lol, that was a long time ago…

      This particular post started with me wanting to put a story around the NIN song… Funny how things roll out.

      For teens, world problems don’t cross their minds and shouldn’t at that age. At that age, it’s all about having a good time with friends, dating and being broke.

      I say let the adults (you and I) worry about world problems, let kids have at least a little fun in life while they are young and innocent.

  6. 101 Centavos
    April 24, 2011

    Family, friends, a good book, and beer (in moderation, of course).
    Glad you eventually got through those dark times.

    • Money Reasons
      April 25, 2011

      In my case it helped to realize that I wasn’t superman, and I can’t fix exerything. Not matter how much I would like to do so, some things are beyond my control.

  7. youngandthrifty
    April 24, 2011

    I think having social support is really important and helpful during the dark times. Having a shoulder to cry on, having someone to bitch to, and having someone listen are invaluable tools :)

    Music and wine help too.

    • Money Reasons
      April 25, 2011

      Music and wine is always good in my opinion, although I was more of a beer and Scotch man back then…

  8. Ravi Gupta
    April 25, 2011

    Great points! I find family and freinds to help the most. Family sometimes, freinds always. Being able to go see someone that doesn’t have any say in the matter and to be able to pour out your feelings is one great way of dealing with dark times. Often times I’ll find the situation not so bad and be able to move forward.

    -Ravi Gupta

    • Money Reasons
      April 25, 2011

      The problems with the girl that I was dating wasn’t anything that my normal friends experienced. They had no clue… Sometimes rationalizing things in your head helps, at least for me it did. And time, it really does heal all wounds, even if it takes years.

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